Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | January 15, 2017

When sexism is… alive and well in Women’s Sports!

In the spring of 1974 I was in 6th grade.My favorite thing to do, my true passion was baseball/softball. I played on a recreational girls team. Our name, The Purple Perfects was sort of, an expection for me, if not a goal. I was the pitcher on our team and I was pretty good, not perfect but I practiced a lot. I tried. I was taught by my coaches and my parents that hard work, practice and paying attention was important and how you got better.

Two thirds of the way through the season we had a game. I was pitching and doing really well. I was pitching a no-hitter! I’d hit two home runs in the game, too! It was in the middle of an inning, I was pitching, and I’d just struck out the second batter. I was called off the mound by both teams coaches and the director/administrator of the league and told I was no longer going to be able to pitch. They said ” I pitched too hard, too fast, and I was too good “. This wasn’t fair to the other girls.

I was crushed! This was my dream!  I was simply replaced and moved to short stop. I cried. I was laughed at for crying. No one seemed to care that this was unfair to me except my best friends Dad, who happened to be at the game. He voiced his opinion but was ignored. The game went on like nothing important happened. Life went on like nothing had changed but in my mind and in my world everything had changed! I didn’t realize it at the time but looking back,  my drive, my self esteem, and my desire to do my best changed for a very long time.

I was watching a sports channel this morning and a question was asked of Commentator Rebekah Lobo, an outstanding basketball player in her own right and a alumni of the UCONN Huskies, “is a 91 game win streak good for women’s basketball “, by the way in my opinion OF COURSE IT IS, it brought that day came rushing back to me. Hasn’t anything changed in 40+ years?

When is competition, winning, and greatness a bad thing?

When sexism is alive and well in Women’s Sports!

Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | August 21, 2014

Ferguson and painful truths

Ferguson and painful truths.

Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | July 29, 2013

Just one more thing I probably shouldn’t post…

Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | May 29, 2012

good POETRY

A good novel, can make me cry a river…

But good poetry, can condense that river…

Into one single, solitary teardrop…

In the corner of, my eye…

That i simply, do not… want to let, fall!

… jaynes ; )

Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | May 27, 2012

For , DUMMIES ; )

Note the yellow ,
black… white and
a little bit of red ,
BOOK

Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | May 12, 2012

About

About.

Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | May 12, 2012

A Place to Write!

Image

Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | May 12, 2012

I am a READER

I AM A READER …

I am a READER …

I love to READ.

So one day while recovering from a surgery and bored i went on Amazon to find a new author and book to read. I found R.E. Bradshaw’s book The Girl Back Home, i’d been on facebook for some time reaquainting my self after thirty years with people i’d gone to high school with so i thought about my girl back home and this title intregued me . So i bought it . it came and one afternoon i started reading it . It was about a women whose relationship had not worked out as she tought it would , and she cheated {something at the time i thought i would never do} ! But the story was well written the scenery and the place and how the author descibed it were to me breathtaking . She felt about the place she grew up like i felt about the place i grew up. ; ) and i liked that, felt a connection to that . So i kept reading the book . i learned about the reasons the main charactor felt somewhat justified but very guilty about herself for cheating. I loved the character Sandy , her girl back home . And i loved how Jamie {the main character}felt about Sandy. I felt different about this book then most of the other LESFIC books i read. I had been talking with another reader who had said something about starting an online readers group and so i went online started a brand new page and went in search for other READERS . On the way i happened to look up R.E.Bradshaw mostly to find other readers that liked this book . “cause i fiured they would be people i would probably like to have in the group as well as other readers from other authors i liked to read. Some how in this process i also found R.E.Bradshaw herself . A thrill for me… We started chatting , I talked to her about what i wanted this group to be …

And that is how lesficREADER was born…

Oh Yeah and did i mention I stayed up all night to finish that book ! ; ) jaynes

thankful my stotry has a happy ending ; )

 

Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | March 4, 2012

The Moment…

OK ,
I think…
I’ll start with…
The kiss !
A cosmic undertaking
I know, but…
Also, essential …
For our growth, Sweetness.
So I search …As we slowly
Lean forward
Into each other…
I watch your mouth
As your tongue slips out
To moisten, your top lip…
Then returns to its cave
It’s well, of replenishment
And i long for, your hydration…
So i move in closer
With deepening anticipation
Needing to, taste that honey… you just spread.
Wanting so much
To feel, what comes next …
And knowing this moment…
Our, one moment… will not, come again.
So I hesitate, a pause if you will…
Just before, our lips meet…
Feeling our breath, leave us and enter us.
This is that moment, our moment Sweetness…
When we look into, each others eyes…
And see forever and right now … becoming one!
That moment, that hardens my nipples…
To my point of no return…
Electricity surging, psoas to tighten…my walls.
Releasing my, Kundalini…
Downward facing, my greatest fears…
My most cherished fantasies, giving in.
To this passion…this euphoria…
Where biology, chemistry, synergy, and telepathy…unite!
Where nothing else matters and nothing else exists…
Where surrender and capture are, the same and where…
Desire’s the hunger…that dims the lights… that lights the candles…
That puts on, that one song… that melts the heart and the body into one!
And enchantment’s the onus…that proves, all things possible…
Yet focusses every ounce, of my strength… every ounce, of my weakness…
Until all I know… all I believe…all I desire and… all I treasure …
Becomes the meeting, of our souls… as we embrace, the power of… this moment in time…
The moment that… your lips, meet mine !
Posted by: ...jaynes ; ) | February 27, 2012

I get so lost in you
At first I feared those words
I didn’t want to take responsibility for what they meant
Oh I knew what they meant
Understood them completely
And thoroughly
But I wasn’t ready for them
Not then I was starting something new and I wasn’t going back to that
Delving into those old feelings and thoughts That old mouse or snake thing I didn’t listen to my inner voice back then and I didn’t want to look at why I didn’t Self reflection is so exhausting and the worst time to do it is when you’re feeling vulnerable
I always think I’m the snake when I’m feeling like that but that’s just my internal show of force because if truth be told I’ve been the mouse way to often in my life and I don’t really like that about me I’d prefer to think of myself as strong and kind not weak and afraid Not just letting it happen to me and picturing my perfect world Not saying anything and keeping who I really am locked up inside my head my heart my very being not existing unless I feel safe and protected . I didn’t feel that way back then and honestly I probably never have since I tried but you can’t make your self feel safe it’s a lie I told myself forever til I thought it was true .
But what you can do is change ! Change your behavior change your approach change your expectation and what you expect from them. Not lower them but change them raise them in someways and understand that this change might not work but , hey neither is what your doing right now RIGHT ! or back when this started at least
There are a lot of ways we as human beings self sabotage Some are instinctual but some are formed simply by habit I decided to start with those First I had to look at what I really and truly wanted needed and wasn’t willing to live without anymore ! SEX !! Instinctual,yes but if i am being honest its still the first thing that pops into my head at any and every given moment Now that could just be me ; ) you might need to find your own thing but that’s something no one else can do but you Damn this therapist is relentless , lol

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